Posted by Julia P on July 29, 2009

41 weeks, 4 days pregnant, and counting…

It’s funny (well, not really), but in this past week, it’s almost become a routine: I wake up, I ask myself, “Do I feel any different?” The answer is no, I curse, and then I check my iPhone (which is laying next to me in bed), and inevitably there is a text, or a comment on facebook or twitter, or an email asking, “Have you had that baby YET?” So I get on twitter, or facebook, or email, and say “Nope, no baby yet.”

I’ve been pregnant for almost 42 weeks.

Not that I really mind, physically. I still feel great, and I really do love being pregnant. If it wasn’t for the complications that a pitocin induced labor could potentially mean for my vbac, I wouldn’t mind at all. And if it wasn’t for the fact that placentas have a natural lifespan of about 42 weeks, I could carry her forever. (Okay, slight exaggeration, but you know what I mean).

When I first found out that I would have to be induced this Thursday, I was a wreck. I wailed. I couldn’t sleep, I was very, very negative. All of the planning that I did, all of the books I read, all of the people I talked to in order to get a vbac…and I was going to be induced. My other choice was a c-section, which to me, wasn’t a choice at all. Of course, an induction is still a vbac…it’s just I was also hoping for a NATURAL vbac, and so I was afraid that the pitocin would blow that part out of the water. Not only that, I was induced the first time, with an unripe cervix, and I fully believe that’s what caused my emergency c-section, to a certain extent. So, initially, an induction meant a repeat c-section to me, and I was devastated.

I’ve since had some time to reflect, and also, to develop a ripened cervix. The last time I was checked by the midwife, I was told I was starting to open! Which, even if she doesn’t make it out in two days on her own, is still a very, very good thing, because it at least means my body is (more) ready to have the baby this time.

Not only that, I’ve come to think of the induction process somewhat differently than I did before. Because I had been absolutely against induction when I first found out, I viewed the attending OB who suggested it, and even my midwife, a little, as the enemy. The medical establishment was, once again, taking away my role in the birth process. Last time, I was a first time mother, and I didn’t know any better, and I let them do whatever they wanted to me. This time, I was going to fight them, dagnabbit! But really, once the anger passed, and the more I thought about it, it’s not like that. While the birth isn’t starting out the way I wanted it to, I need not allow my whole plan to derail. That’s another thing I learned as a second time mother: just trust your gut. I don’t plan to go to the hospital that morning hostile. That would be stupid. But I do plan on talking to the doctor that day, and telling him that I am not his patient (because I’m not). Perhaps in every other type of practice, there are patients, and there are doctors. But in this labor process, he and I are partners. I know he has had many years of training, and seen many cases and women, but this is my child, this is my body, and this is only going to be a good experience for all three of us if I can trust him. And I can only trust him if he respects me. If something needs to be done, explain to me why. If I don’t want something to be done, and it’s not absolutely necessary for the health of myself or my child, then respect my wishes.

I refuse to be a bystander at my own child’s birth. I am not a patient, I am a partner.

8 Comments »

1. Good luck Julia! Perhaps she’ll make some progress tonight!! –Alison
   P.S. I love your writing style. Do you have a blog?

   Comment by Alison — July 29, 2009 @ 9:43 am

2. Good luck to you!!! I am 41 weeks and I assumed I would go near my due date, (secoud child) and natural. Now they talk induction I fear drugs and that I will not be in control. I know in the end a healthy baby is the goal, but with so much prep it is really frustrating!
   Will think of you!
   Jenn

   Comment by Jenn — July 29, 2009 @ 10:57 am

3. Thank you so much for posting this! What a great thing for me to read. I am 10 weeks pregnant with my second child, and I too was induced with my first. While we didn’t have to have a C-Section, we had all kinds of issues with the birth. I was induced for hypertension and even now I wonder if it was really necessary. I’m not bitter, but I have a No Induction goal this time and have shared this with my new midwife (we moved, I didn’t just change doctors). I already feel so different this time around. I’m not freaked out about every little thing I feel, and I feel a little more in control. Let’s hope this continues for me!

   Best of luck to you, though I’m sure by now you have had your little girl!

   Comment by KristaRae — August 8, 2009 @ 11:38 am

4. Julia thanks you, Alison, Jenn, and KristaRae, for your well wishes! We hope to hear how things went with her birth soon when she is our guest and shares her birth story. Things seem to be going well at home with her new sweetie!

   Comment by Patti — August 12, 2009 @ 8:36 pm

5. I am really enjoy read your story. I am 41 weeks pregnant now. My doc make me feel like need be induced which I disagree. Baby knows when to come out there. Why they can’t be More patience?I am having nagetive feeling too. But I am goons fight for me and my baby. I believe natural take cate of us. Wish me luck!!!!

   Comment by Che che — September 24, 2009 @ 1:56 pm

6. Your story gave me hope. I am going onto 41 weeks now. I really do not want to be induced and want labor to be completely natural with no induction and drugs, as I did with my first two pregnancies. I am praying my doctor will respect my wishes. Your story gave me more courage to stand up for what I want.
   Thank You!

   Comment by Kim — November 7, 2009 @ 3:52 pm

7. I am 41 weeks today.This is my second son. I want to have a natural birth and I am hopeful that my dilation has progressed since last week. I was 2 1/2 CM and 50% effaced at my last appointment. With my first son, my water broke before my body was ready and I ended up in the hospital hooked up to pitocin. I was there almost 2 days. My son was born perfectly healthy, about a week shy of his due date. He weighed in at 7 pounds 4 ounces. I want things to happen naturally this time and I am hopeful. If things look good today when the doctor checks on my placenta and fluid level, I want to atleat wait until 42 weeks. I’m going out today to walk around with my sister before my appointment. I am hoping that this will help. I have been having small contractions and feeling more pressure each day. I will post an update to let you know the results of my experience :) michelle

   Comment by M — December 8, 2009 @ 10:15 am

8. Well here he is ..my son..Eli :) I held off the induction until 41 weeks and 4 days. My pain level was pretty high at that point. My lower back started giving out on me. I was hoping to not have to be induced, but after my doctor’s appointment on the 8th, my doctor thought it would be best for us to go in the following day. It was stressful for me getting ready to go to my “induction appointment”:) rather than just letting things happen naturally, but at the same time, we were excited in knowing “this is it!” “today’s the day!” Also, not having to get up in the middle of the night in an achy frenzied state, made going in “as planned” much easier to deal with. Things went pretty smoothly. I arrived at 10:30 AM, we started the pitocin and Eli was born at 5:05 PM. 8 pounds 5 ounces of pure goodness, sleeping peacefully in my lap as I type this. Good lUck to all of you mother’s and mother’s to be. Know that even if you don’t want to have an induction..if that’s what is needed..you and baby(s) shall be just fine in the end :)

   Comment by M — December 14, 2009 @ 4:50 pm

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