stealing anothers thunder

[Tortilla]

I'm 23 weeks pregnant and my sister in-law just had her beautiful little girl 3 weeks ago. It came out in an argument between all of my in-laws (not including my husband and I) that my sister in-law and her husband were mad at us for getting pregnant. Their feeling are that we were trying to steal their thunder. I am of the feeling that my baby deserves just as much attention and excitement as hers without stealing anyone's thunder. This is causing a rift in the family. Does anyone have any suggestions on keeping the peace.

[skipnjif]

Oh honey.. I can't say that I have any advice, but I COMPLETELY relate and understand. With each of my babies, different members of my family had reactions similar or identical to this. Even though it caused me some real heartache, I eventually came to ignore their whining and told them that any child was a gift and a miracle, no matter whose schedule they arrive on and that if it was so offensinve to them, they didn't have to be involved. Nobody REALLY wanted to be left out, so they held their tounges and, when both of the babies were actually here, everyone seemed to forget their complaints and were caught up in the new arrival.

[Tortilla]

Thank you. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who has had to go through such nonsense. Time can be an amazing thing when smoothing over family issues.

[hathor]

Hey. I'm new here... I know I'm replying to this a little late, but holy cow I can totally relate- from the other side of things!

I really hate to admit it, even to myself, but I am a little upset that my younger brother and his partner are pregnant as well. I'm six weeks further along than them. I know there is NO WAY that they got pregnant to 'steal my thunder', but... there's still a tiny part of me that wanted all the attention for having the first grandchild. It's so selfish and I hate that I feel even this little bit of it! However, I would NEVER tell them this. All it would do is cause hurt feelings, and I really do want them to experience all the the joys and excitement.

I guess I just wanted to say that I kind of understand your sister-in-law's feelings, but I think that is something that should NOT be shared. Sometimes we're supposed to keep our mouths shut. She probably knows how selfish and unreasonable the feelings are. I'm sorry for your angst. Family life is just so complicated.;)