Topic Archive: Paula

September 30, 2011

Baby Bunching Breakdown

I have been married for eight-and-a-half years.  In that time, I have been pregnant for 3 years and two months, nursing for four years and three month, and actively potty training for 7 months.  I have changed roughly  22,700 diapers every day over the past six years and three months and I have been on less than ten childless dates in that same period of time.  When laid out like this, it may seem like a good case for institutionalization, but these very facts put me in a unique, but not unpopulated group of parents known as “baby bunchers.”

It isn’t that I set out to become such a thinly-spread and busy keeper of what often more closely resembles a zoo than a home.  In fact, before having my first child, my “plan” was to have an even number of children (two or four) roughly three years apart.  Then, when my first- and, arguably, easiest- baby came along, I was instantly curious about the next.  I was so in love with my baby and being a mother that I couldn’t keep myself from imagining how the second child would add to our family.  How would (s)he get along with Scotty?  What would it be like to balance two?  How would his or her personality differ from Scotty’s?   And so it came to pass that Claire was born 19 months after her brother, Daniel less than two years after that, and Andrew another 23 months later.

As I sit amid the rubble of a storm of little people and savor the precious few minutes of silence as everyone rests, I cannot help reflect on the benefits and downfalls of such a closely knit group. (more…)

July 18, 2011

My Mommy Body

I have a confession: I was a fat kid.  Nearly nine pounds at birth, baby three-chins, tall and “solid” all through school…I was neither an athlete nor a prom queen.  When I went to college, my “freshman fifteen” came fast and easy.  Try as I may, I could not shed the weight that had plagued me the first two decades of my life…until I moved across country and became a nanny.  Living with an ultra-thin foodaphobe gave me a jump start to eat healthier, exercise more, and shun the junk food.  In ten months, I shaved off roughly 40 pounds and was finally (mostly) comfortable in my skin.

I maintained my weight and healthy body-image over the next few years- through dating and marriage, my early-twenties were a time of confidence and security.  Shortly before becoming pregnant with my first child, I confessed to my mom that I was terrified of becoming pregnant for fear of becoming heavy again.  She assured me that I wouldn’t care so much once I had my children.  That the feeling of empowerment from nurturing life would drown any petty concerns over the size of my hips or the lack of muscle tone.

She was wrong…. (more…)

May 31, 2011

The Great Bed Switch

Way back in the spring of 2010, upon revealing that we would be expanding our family by one, people began inquiring about our plans for sleeping accommodations.  After all, they pointed out, a family with four children- living in a four bedroom house- must be quite purposeful in their planning.  In general, I brushed these plans aside with a casual, “Oh, we have some time- the baby will first be sleeping in the cradle in the ‘baby suite’ anyway.  We’ll figure it out!”

Perhaps experience taught me that one can never foresee where each child will be until one is actually at that point.  Or perhaps- with an early-riser in a room he couldn’t imagine ever giving up, the one-and-only girl in her very own (and very pink) safe-haven, and a curious two-year-old anxiously anticipating his emancipation from the crib- I simply did not want to face the reality of the challenge that I inherently knew lay ahead.  Either way…my time for avoidance has expired. (more…)

April 20, 2011

Caring for Kids: A Lone Star No More

My family is poised on the edge of great change. This week marks the end of a long and trying three months without my husband at home.  Just seven weeks after the birth of our fourth child, he went to work out-of-state.  I was left at home with a five-year-old, a nearly four-year-old, a two-year-old, a newborn, a house to be maintained, and no idea when or where we would reunite.  But before I paint an illustrious picture of some monumental trial by fire, let me pay proper to homage to the women who have been in my position for far longer than my weary head can even fathom.  I personally, have dear friends whose husbands have been on training and combat missions, significantly extended work assignments, or other non-family-friendly living situations; women whose time of separation numbered in the many months, rather than ten weeks.  They are the ones who truly deserve great sympathy, admiration, and respect. (more…)

March 3, 2011

Baby, Relax

It’s tempting to think that, by the fourth child, there is nothing new to learn or try.  While I readily admit that I have abandoned many of the gadgets and gizmos I once thought invaluable, and I no longer shuffle through books every odd day in anticipation of the next developmental milestone or sleep theory; I find that the world of parenting still holds treasures untold.  In the past few months, I have had the pleasure of sharing a precious experience with my youngest son through infant massage.

(more…)

February 15, 2011

How Love Grows

My baby is unfolding…

I mean that both literally and metaphorically.  At two months old, the last vestiges of his newborn ways seem to be falling away.  More and more, he releases those protective little  fists and spreads his fingers to grab at things around him.  His legs no longer tuck against my chest whenever I hold him near.  My tiny 19 inch bundle which weighed less than seven pounds when I brought him home is now 23 inches long and is nearing eleven pounds.  His voice is becoming fuller and louder and he has begun cooing at the fan above.  He resembles less of a spastic “flyer” (my five-year-old’s description of the way he waves his arms when he startles).  And just this week, he proved that the tight swaddle is a thing of the past with his Houdinni-like escapes.

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February 1, 2011

Is Four a Crowd?

I was in the store with my kids this morning and met countless curious side-long glances and sympathetic smiles.  Granted, I was attempting to heft a number of oversized plastic bins into a shopping cart with an infant strapped to my front and toddler pinned between my knees.  But in considering the excessive interest in my situation, I came to this realization;  with the birth of my fourth child seven weeks ago, I seem to have entered a new category in society: “the woman with all of those children.”   Now, people actually stop me to comment on my children or our family “situation.”  While this was a much unforeseen outcome of our decision to add to our family, I actually appreciate the humor of  being a public spectacle.

The following are the most common reactions to such a sight. (more…)